SHINE ON YOU CRAZY DAISY, VOLUME 3
What a dream come true! I’m now a published author, eeeeekkkk!
The wonderful Trudy Simmons of the @daisychaingroup has been collating a series of books with one aim - to inspire and motivate more female entrepreneurs, and I’m really proud to be part of this fantastic collaboration of amazing businesswomen.
‘Shine on you Crazy Daisy’ is a collection of inspirational stories from female entrepreneurs to encourage & motivate you through the good times and the tough times in business and in life. It tells the stories of tenacious, rebellious and resilient women that are working towards the future they want to build for themselves and their families.
And I got to write a chapter about my story in this amazing book!
If you have your own business, or are thinking about starting one, this is the book for you. It’s for women entrepreneurs who want to hear the real stories of what it takes to be yourself and run a business. You can learn from inspirational women just like you who have been there, done it and have several t-shirts! Learn that your past does not have to define your future. And you can do anything that you want to do, despite what you hear from others, or in your own mind.
Here's the chapter that I wrote…
Hello Me
by Jennifer Spurr
Growing up I was such a ‘good girl’. I did all the things I was ‘supposed’ to do: work hard at school, get the grades, go to university, get the degree. Then I landed an exciting marketing career for a big-name company. Expectation and momentum launched me up the corporate ladder so fast I didn’t even stop to take a breath. It was expected of me, it was what I ‘should’ do, so that is what I did.
It wasn’t until much, much later that I realised - the ladder I was climbing, was leaning against the wrong bloody wall.
On paper I had my life totally together. I was flying in my career as Marketing Manager for some of the biggest Consumer Goods brands in the world. Products I developed hit the supermarket shelves and TV adverts I made aired on Saturday night primetime TV. I knew from the outside my career looked exciting and fulfilling, other people buzzed with excitement for me, but inside it just didn’t feel like that. I was overworked and overwhelmed. Where there should have been excitement, I felt fear. Where there should have been drive and vision, I felt paralysed. I had no clear idea of where I was going and I felt I wasn’t good enough to be doing what I was doing. But, the only way I knew how to be better was to work even harder. If I was better at my job, then I’d like it more, then I’d feel better about myself…wouldn’t I?
Fast forward a few years and my husband and I started trying for a baby. One month turned into 3 which turned into 12. Eventually I became pregnant, but at the 12-week scan the baby didn’t have a heartbeat. A missed miscarriage. It was devastating and complicated and sad, but eventually we picked ourselves up and carried on trying to conceive. Another year passed and I was pregnant again. But it was the same story, a missed miscarriage. And then again, for a third time. Throughout this time, work was a crutch I leaned on heavily as a means to avoid the feelings that my body was letting me down. Career-wise, my hard work continued to pay off. But looking back, I can see this period left me feeling me totally disconnected from myself.
Eventually after three and a half years I got pregnant and stayed pregnant this time. Which was wonderful and terrifying. Mostly terrifying. Pregnancy after multiple miscarriages is a whole different beast, full of anxiety and fear. I was too scared to let myself hope that the baby might survive but felt too broken to survive another loss. I had to keep myself in emotional limbo just to survive. In the last trimester I felt like I didn’t breathe. I was terrified that I had gotten this far and would then lose the baby in labour, it was a dark place to be. With relief and joy and disbelief, my daughter Emmy was born. Then just over a year later, her sister Neve arrived. I felt, and still feel, so lucky. They’re happy and healthy and funny and feisty and all those wonderful things.
It was at this point that everything changed for me. Whilst on maternity leave I was having therapy to help me process the impact of the miscarriages. As I started to reconnect with myself I found I was thinking about my job more and more and what it might be like to do something else. I signed up to a coaching experience that a friend had recommended to me. It was transformative. I felt I made a connection with myself that I had never had before and I finally discovered, and truly understood, what was important to me. I could see how I had been holding myself back from my true purpose. I learnt about my inner critic and listened to what it was saying to me - it was so loud and so mean! Through coaching I heard a new voice, an inner ‘me’, she was kind, supportive and nurturing. I connected with my strengths and passions and what truly lights me up. I worked out what my definition of success looked like - not what I ‘should’ do or what was ‘expected’ of me. I found my voice, my passions, my purpose. I found me and it felt empowering.
By the time my maternity leave was coming to an end I knew I needed to tip the balance back. I had recognised through coaching that there were parts of my corporate role that I did love, and parts that I was no longer willing to give my energy to. So, I negotiated returning to work on the terms that were right for me. My company were supportive and offered me a position working in a role I genuinely found interesting and fulfilling. It was three days a week so I could spend the other days at home soaking up time with my daughters. I had time. I had space in my head. I could breathe. I started doing stuff just for me, simply because it gave me joy. I followed my passion for meditation and became a meditation teacher. I was so inspired by my coaching experience that I completed a coaching qualification, swiftly followed by NLP practitioner training and hypnotherapy, as well as other powerful modalities.
The more time I spent immersed in the coaching world, the more I couldn’t ignore its pull. I felt I wanted to do something more than Marketing. Something more than helping big businesses become even bigger. I knew if I wanted to stay in this career, I would have to go back to full-time working. The thought of the 8 til late hustle and never-ending-office-days was no longer appealing now I had two small humans waiting for me at home. I kept thinking, “my two daughters are looking at me as their example of how to live, of what it means to be a woman”. So, I made a stand. I refused to be another casualty of the patriarchal rat race or show my girls that working like this was OK. I decided to follow my gut instinct, my intuition, the gorgeous new voice of my inner-me and I made a list.
I wanted to create a business that I felt passionate about. A business that would have a positive impact on the world. And that would enable me to fulfil my dreams, make impactful work and nurture my creativity. I also wanted to be a present and connected mum. I wanted to do the school run. I wanted to be the one my daughters talk about their day to. Who helps them with their homework, takes them to the beach after school and who wipes away their tears. By understanding what I love to do and what I’m good at, as well as what I want my life to look and feel like, I created a business plan that would work for me as much as it would my clients. I finally put my ladder against the right wall. I now run my own coaching and consultancy business.
There are two parts to my business. The first is Life and Business Coaching where I support ambitious women to step into their confidence and power to create a life they love, filled with possibility and potential. My experience as a corporate leader and people manager, combined with my coaching qualifications and capabilities, helps me to create a safe and supportive environment that enables women to thrive. My experience in brand strategy and marketing also helps me to guide female entrepreneurs as they launch and grow their successful businesses, whatever stage they’re at. The second part of my business is brand consultancy, where I help larger businesses to increase their impact and scale by supporting them with their brand strategy and positioning, and by working with them to develop purposeful and impactful marketing.
Don’t get me wrong, owning my own business comes with its challenges and struggles. I missed the safety that came with corporate life at first; the boundless creativity of my team, the supportive hum of an office environment knowing we were all part of something together, and of course, the security of a guaranteed pay cheque each month! I had to build myself a new network and supportive community fairly early on; people who I could ask all my questions to, who were ahead of me in their entrepreneurial journey, who could give me good advice and perspective. It’s been wonderful connecting with so many inspiring, supportive people who are walking a similar journey to me. I’ve also had to learn what boundaries mean as an entrepreneur. I was good at these as an employee, but running my own business, one that I love, where I’m bursting full of ideas, means I would work 24/7 if I could. But I know this isn’t healthy or sustainable, so I am relearning what self-care looks like for me as a business owner. And I work hard, harder probably than I ever worked in my corporate role, but it’s a different kind of work. Instead of taking energy from me it gives energy to me, it makes me feel alive, I buzz with excitement for myself now.
And the future feels so exciting. I’m planning sustainable growth for my business in line with what my family needs and in a way that compliments being a present and connected mum. My current focus is connecting with and supporting as many women as I can through 1:1 coaching, launching new group programmes and women’s circles with the goal of helping every woman re-learn what they intuitively already know.
It’s my life purpose that keeps me focused and moving forward, even on the tough days. My ethos is simple. What I want for my daughters is what I want for all women. I want all women to feel a deep, fierce and powerful connection with themselves. To trust their inner-knowing and believe in their strength and capabilities. I want them to connect with themselves so solidly that they have no choice but to become more and more their truest self. I want women to shamelessly, fearlessly, and relentlessly show up for themselves. I believe that when we step into this version of ourselves we become a shining example for other women around us to do the same. I believe this is how we change the world, first transforming on the individual level and then supporting the future generations to stay connected with themselves. Can you imagine a world where women feel unstoppable? Where women realise their goals and dreams as if they were already given? I can, let’s make it happen.
I hope you enjoyed my chapter. You can pick up the book on Amazon: